✨ This Needy, Good News Girl is Thankful Auburn Sucks Just Enough For Georgia to Win ✨

But not thankful for another head-in-wall inducing sloppy start-middle-end by my beloved Dawgs ❤️🖤

1. This Georgia Girl Is Tired of These First Half Shenanigans.

Y’all…

Thank God for Brock Bowers. Let’s hope TayTay don’t try and holla at this tight end next.

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But now these still undefeated, no. 1-ranked Georgia Bulldawgs (5-0, 2-0 SEC, 1-0 SEC EAST), have something they didn’t have on their bingo card this year: They Might Have to be Afraid of Kentucky?!

A new teammate is an UK fan, and since I don’t have that many UK fan friends, and I’d like to keep this one on my good side, I’ll actually refrain from talking shit this week because Mark Stoops is still the coach, right?

*GOOGLES RQ*

Yes. We’re gucci then ;-)

2. Auburn Sucks.

Boy, howdy — the 2023 edition of The Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry was SLOPPY on the side of the Georgia Bulldawgs.

But, despite the plethora of stars down on the Plains this weekend, it wasn’t enough War Eagle vibes to hand ol’ Aubie the win.

I am not mad about it — A W is a W. Plus, I get to queue up my all time favorite:

3. If You Can Click Through Round 1, You Should Have Enough Energy To Click Through Round 2.

✨ 😘 A Good Girl Is a Brat With Poise Who Loves to Relish in the Fact of Being Right: Chiefs-Jets Commentators Planned on Talking More About Taylor Swift Until ‘a Game Broke Out in Front of Us’ (The Messenger)

Because WE ALL KNOW that wasn’t about KillaTrav (with his fine ass…damn, he’s so fine). This was about TayTay. I, for one, watched reruns of my beloved Dateline (and did y’all see it’s coming on Thursdays AND Fridays this season!?).

🤦🏾‍♀️ Random AF Headline of the Day

Welp, I’ve heard it all now: Police Release Bizarre Digital Composite Image of Suspect Wanted in Sex Assault of Dog Walker

• Kim Kardashian and Tom Brady Get Into Multi-Million Dollar Bidding War at Charity Event (The Messenger)

• Mattel Honors Stevie Nicks With Her Own Barbie (The Messenger)

• ‘I Kissed a Boy That You Like’: Vicious Fights Between Cheerleaders Lead to $6 Million Bullying Lawsuit (The Messenger)

• WATCH: Moment YouTube Prankster Tanner Cook Was Shot in the Chest — and the Jury Said It Was Self Defense (The Messenger)

• What is Metastatic Prostate Cancer? All About Len Goodman’s Cause Of Death, Its Symptoms And Life Expectancy (The Messenger)

• Aliyah Boston Named Unanimous WNBA Rookie of the Year (The Messenger)

• To Fight Polio, Pakistan Officials Are Considering Throwing Parents In Jail If They Fail To Get Their Kids Immunized (The Messenger)

• Anya Taylor-Joy Celebrates Marriage With Malcolm McRae in Star-Studded Venice Ceremony: Report (The Messenger)

• Robin Williams' daughter says she finds AI recreations of her father's voice 'personally disturbing' (Business Insider)

• Here’s Why Apple’s FineWoven iPhone Cases Scratch and Stain So Easily (The Messenger)

• Joel Embiid Still Deciding Between Cameroon, France and United States for 2024 Olympics (The Messenger)

• British Morning Show Speculates Over Possible Meghan Markle Political Impact After Death of Dianne Feinstein (The Messenger)

• Tim Wakefield, who revived his career and Red Sox trophy case with knuckleball, has died at 57 (Associated Press)

• Woman Shows Up to Málaga Airport Totally Naked, Runs From Police (The Messenger)

• A 5G Satellite Is Now One of the Brightest Objects in the Night Sky (The Messenger)

• Guard Attacked, Killed Escorting Prisoner From Cafeteria: Officials (The Messenger)

• McCarthy ‘Not Worried’ as He Faces Takedown by Hardliners (The Messenger)

• Texas Mom Says 300-lb Pig Keeps Attacking Family: ‘Shouldn’t Have to Live Like This’ (The Messenger)

• Charlotte Sena Missing: Everything We Know About Disappearance, Amber Alert After Child Vanishes on NY Bike Ride (The Messenger)

• Swimmer Vanishes After Shark Attack At Popular California Beach: ‘Not Your Typical Attack’ (The Messenger)

• *‘RHOBH’ Cast Changes Were ‘Great’ and ‘Needed,’ Says Garcelle Beauvais (Exclusive) * (The Messenger)

• United Auto Workers And Mack Trucks Avoid Strike With Tentative Deal (The Messenger)

• Smash Mouth Singer Steve Harwell’s Ashes to Be Buried at Los Gatos Memorial Park (The Messenger)

• Indiana Child Dies of Mysterious Illness — Officials Fear There is a Threat to Public Health (The Messenger)

• A Recession Is Still Well on Its Way. In Fact, We May Already Be in One (The Messenger)

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Must Read:

🕰️ ADHD and Waiting Mode Paralysis: 5 Steps to Regain Control

4. T's Tasty Tune for Today

This is a feel good bop we need right now. This is N*SYNC’S “Better Place.”

Legit glad N*SYNC recorded this track together. I miss JC’s voice 🥹

5. NSFW Meme of the Day, PT. 1

Save this and send to your boo thang when they aren’t expecting it.

6. NSFW Meme of the Day, PT. 2.

It’s a saucy Monday.

7. Corrections/Editor’s Notes.

Even a Web Queen makes mistakes. As my Web King used to tell me, and as it is imprinted on my heart (I should also get it tattooed somewhere) — “T, hon — slow down and do it right.”

1. In the 9/29/23 edition of this program, my edits were not edited correctly, and I published the newsletter with typos in the ordering. I regret this error.

   1. What’s fucked up about this error is that my full time job is editing and assigning stories. Apparently, not my own!

   2. Note: it’s hard to do this and a full time job, loves. My ADHD on no meds was showing HARD. ✌🏾

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